The Calm Before the Storm

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The Calm Before the Storm

Insignificant, I seem to be

Night arrives, and underneath the silver of the moon

I get lost trying to find

A place that feels like home

Something that is familiar

A voice that brings comfort

She is empty again, they say

Can’t you see

Look how broken she is

Have I come undone?

Underneath the silver of the moon

The air is still

But it is the calm

Before the tragic storm

Raging tears arrive

Like a hurricane of emotion

I have left the stillness of the night

Now drowning in the river

Who took pieces of me away

That crawls through my heart

Further and further from my reach

He is gone

I can’t find him anywhere

He was taken in an instant

Taken like he was nothing

Nothing was the taker

An angel is who he took

Left us in the shadowed memories of what was

To be

I scream for him

I scream his name

Into the silence of the night

Into the calm before the storm

The storm inside my heart

I fight everyday

In the absence of him

He, who was I

The other part of me

Forever in time, we always were

A part of each other

Until a nothing took my no one

From me

Left me

So insignificant because I can’t bring him back

Underneath the silver of the moon

I am the storm

~~ J. Lefever ~~

(01/28/13)

 

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My brother. My best friend. I love you more than all the stars in the sky.

I miss you more than words can say.

I will miss you until my last dying breath…

~ Sis

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11 responses to “The Calm Before the Storm

    • Thanks D. It’s really hard to write about this.. really hard on me. My brother is… was… so much a part of my life, a part of me. We were close. I mean, for siblings, we were very close. Only 2 years apart. We were a part of everything for each other. My life is so different.. weird.. I hate it. I cry a lot. ~J

      • Although my sister’s are still with us, I did lose my dad this past March. I know your pain. It helped me to write about it. It only helped a little, but that was something.

    • My heart is searching for him A. Searching everyday.. screaming.. crying out for him.. It hurts so bad. When I type these words and look at them on the screen.. it’s not good enough. It doesn’t describe it enough.. That’s why I really haven’t written much about it because.. there really is no justice. 😦

  1. Pingback: SOFTLY REACHING THROUGH CHAOS « hastywords

  2. Deana, I am sorry for your loss sweetheart. I can’t even think about the day when I lose my dad. My dad and I are so close. I don’t know what I’d do without my dad. I am very sorry. Loss and grieving of any kind is hard, no matter who or what you are grieving over. Pain is pain, and it hurts all of us. Thank you for your kindness, and support.. and your words! I appreciate you very much! You are fabulous girl and I’m glad we connect! ~ j

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