A Free Write
When we experience struggle, sadness, failure, and challenges in our life, it becomes hard to pick up the pieces of our shattered faith. We take all the elements of our life, and with great precision, we apply them to our healing process. In the end, some are taught a valuable lesson and others may never learn. With this new-found wisdom, we step out into our world, re-born to experience it all, in a new state of mind, appreciating more, all that we see. We are our greatest teachers and if you want something bad enough you can have it. I somehow find a way to buy a really expensive pair of shoes, when I can’t afford them, I find a way. This can be applied to something, anything, you want so badly.
With that I wrote this short, something, about finding strength within you, in myself, the pursuit of self-awareness and having faith inside yourself. In a moment when I thought that this was the end, it brought me to a place where it all began…again.
Some days I feel like I am part of this destiny, this plan. My fate was staring right at me. Something that has been determined from day one. Constantly I am consumed with this ‘what if’ thinking. What if I have done this, or haven’t done that. But how productive is that really? I surrendered to my actions, I had to – I cannot change them. When I drive in this new city, and look at the mountains, I feel this higher power more than ever! It’s like, all my battles have brought me here. They were meant to take place. This grand destiny has taken place and I am home. I feel like I’m home within myself. As beads of sweat dropped from my face that day, a police car was chasing me at a top speed, and I was being taken on a life threatening ride with a drug dealer that I didn’t even know. I didn’t belong there. That was not supposed to be my path. I grew up so well, such a great family. Where did I take a wrong turn? When did I get so lost? I had lost my spirit, along the way, and I was begging for it to come back. And, it did. That was where my life began, again. However, at the time I thought it was when my life was going to end. Funny how the world works. Funny what it took for my life to begin.