The Gift of Sight … & Other Mindless Ramblings

2a6c6860d077ba0224be74a37918cf2d

The Gift of Sight … & Other Mindless Ramblings

Today I read a story …

I just read a blog post about a man who needs to get glasses for the first time in his life. I read it, it was a cute, little life story. Not HUGE, or pivotal in any way. Nor was it too sad or incredibly tragic. It was just, a simple event that has taken place in a mans life that is new and he will need to adjust to somewhat.

I posted in the comments about how it made me feel reading this. The writer probably could care less, but that’s ok. It’s interesting how writing a little piece about having to get glasses for the first time in life, when read by the many different souls & lives of others, and takes us all to such different places.

First it made me think how nice it would be to have ‘that’ to adjust to right now in life. I relate to this because I too have to go through this life adjustment, which is not a choice mf mine, it is a forced change. Some change is fun because we may choose the new thing in life. But then there are the other changes, the adjustments that we get, from life, in life and by life, that we have not chosen at all.

Mine is having to adjust to my brother being gone. See, my best friend, forever life companion since age 3 when he was born, my brother, my family, my only sibling, my blood, the ‘guy’ version of me was killed a year and a half ago. I am not adjusted … yet … don’t know if I ever will be. It’s the most confusing pain I have ever felt. And the life adjustment to not having a brother after having one my whole life, it is all I know, sucks. It’s so painful there are no words to describe.

I commented how nice it would be if I could ‘trade life lists’ with someone. I can’t say who cause I would NOT wish what I am feeling on anyone in the world … So really, I wouldn’t want to trade, but toss nice out and get someone elses, list, of things I have to adjust to cause life says so and I have no choice otherwise. Ah …

The other thing that this makes me think of is … because of my brother, who donated his ‘gifts’ when he was taken from us, someone who was blind can now see because he was given my brothers eyes.

I cried when I got the letter.

Somewhere in this world, someone is seeing through my little brothers eyes. It is a beautiful thing, a rare and precious gift to give and to be given, and It is also very sad and weird.

People get lost in their own lives so much that they are blind and ignorant to some of the people who may be ‘surviving’ right along with them.  I walk this world and I bump into people I know, and people forget that I have a hole in my heart, daily, that suffocates me. And people wonder what is wrong … Someone has my brothers eyes and someone else on this earth killed my brother and took him from me forever. My loss was someone else’s gain. For that I am grateful … but also sad for my loss … sad is an understatement … and I don’t care what people ‘think’ anymore.

I do hope that people appreciate their lives in simplicity.

Be grateful for having to adjust to wearing glasses.

Somewhere, someone just lost their eyes forever.

Somewhere, someone has to adjust to being blind, or cripple, or adjust to living their life suddenly without their dearly loved one.

This is NOT a message to anyone in particular either. I am only using the story I read, of the man who told about his life event of getting glasses, as the catalyst to what got me thinking of these other things. And how words are full of meaning … and so completely different depending on the person.

 eb292df035c105d1251d11220d2a2e09

January 2014

*Feeling very aware this evening.*

I have been so busy with work and life’s other things lately, that I have not written much on Tryst at all. I have not wanted to share too much these past 8 months. (Wow, that long) I am a free, light and loving soul who can’t just write and write about the one sadness that is plaguing me so terribly. Who cares about what I’m going through and I would not want to go back and read it again, so, yes … in my Tryst absence, I truly miss my care-free life I had when I still had my brother, but everything has changed. Everything has changed. I have changed. I am trying to get back to me … and people just do not understand … how hard it is … to wake up every day with this reality slapping you in the face and stabbing you in the heart.

Truth … it does feel good to write right now … regardless of how ridiculous or pointless or repetitive or redundant my words are … they are still mine and this is what I feel like saying right now.

***

imagesCA7G9C0Y

 
©Think. Speak. Tryst. Publication
Advertisements

13 responses to “The Gift of Sight … & Other Mindless Ramblings

  1. I was so glad to see a post from you J. Write if it feels right. Do whatever it takes to get back to YOU. I know you to be such a caring, feeling, loving person that I only hope you are able to feel the love given so freely to you by those you hold dear. I was a recipient of the soulshine you emanate so unknowingly, and I will always be truly grateful for having met you. Please just do whatever is necessary for YOU to become whole again. (or as much as that is possible given the circumstances.)
    Also know that your brothers eye’s were not his only gift in his absence. His spirit remains and I am sure will help you see your way to the light when you are ready. This I can only hope for you my dear friend.

    My sincerest loving wishes for you J.

    John

    • Oh hi! Hi sweet friend! I so LOVE your messages! It is hard to get it all out there .. but good & healthy from time to time! Im alright.. hanging in there. Hoping for a BIG new year with my ItWorks Business and other Businesses! I need something to get better .. and by that I mean me. I need to move forward, and relocate from kc. Too many things here holding me back. I miss my bro so bad. Life sure is hard. Im glad to know you’re here if I need a friend. Thank you for that. So much! LOVE ♥ LIGHT ~ and OF course SOULSHINE! – J

      • So very glad you feel some light and positivity emanating from your response dear friend. I wish things were better for you. I SO just wanna give you a great big hug right now. So MENTAL HUGS to you for sure. Keep the soulshine bright and ANYTIME you need a friend to listen, you know where to reach me. Never be afraid to reach out if ya need someone.

        Love,

        John

      • Jen,

        I have been thinking about you my friend. Have not seen you anywhere so I figured I would drop a line here in the hopes that you see it. I miss you terribly, and hope you are around more often soon. Be well my sweet friend and Hugs and Love from me to you.

        John

      • Hi there friend!!! Yes, I am here and I am alright!! I am in the middle of a HUGE promotion with my MLM businesses .. up for $25,000 and I am working hard to get it!! So, that explains where I am all the time!! Lol .. working my boo-tay off!! This has put my writing on the back shelf for some time now. But my work is important and I love what I do! I need to create specific times off when I am not working, but it’s really hard!! I hope this finds you well and I will be through this promo by the 31st of March! Then I can rest!! Till then.. I’ll be a very busy woman!!! Hugs and Soulshine!! – Jen

      • Glad you are busy and okay. I hadn’t seen you and was a bit concerned for your well being, so I had to reach out. I miss you but understand the busy aspect. My life has been hectic with changes as well, but I am okay minus a few bumps in the road. (see my most recent post “turbulence”). But our warrior hearts are strong so we will both be okay. I look back to that piece we wrote together often my friend and draw strength and inspiration from it. Anyway, I am glad you are alright. Throw me some soulshine every once in a while if you have a second and are thinkin of me. Be well, and keep the soulshine bright.

        XO

        John

      • BIG (smiles) my dear friend!!! I love that I have friendly correspondence, waiting for me in the land of Tryst & WP … here with all my creative and extremely talented companions of the written word … but yes, life has me busy!! I have lessened my stress, immensely!! Of course, I miss my brother, terribly, but I always will. Today I am learning, and getting better at living with a peaceful heart, a busy mind and a balanced schedule. I work, I relax and travel, and I have time alone to paint (which is what I have been doing a lot of lately), listen to music, meditate, and do yoga. I do other stuff when I’m alone, in my quiet space, like read and contemplate many things. But in all of this, we are all busy and have lots going on.

        My work is going extremely well and I have been building and growing my MLM businesses, making internet millions (Ha! Not yet, but I will be making 7 figures a year in a couple years. Crazy to think huh? The opportunity that I share with the world makes millionaires in as little as 2 years!!! So incredible!!) So I thank God on a daily, and I see and feel my many blessings. I have really done well in my healing, and with that I keep going forward. Work is good, and my family is also good. So, at this point, I am solely concentrating on the good aspects of my life and feeding them.

        Thank you so much for checking in on me. It is really kind and I really appreciate it. Thank you so much sweet friend!! Thank you for being you!! XO

        – Jen

      • I am so glad you are in better spirits these days Jen. I really am. I look forward to when you have more time for your creative writing side. Eventually we WILL finish that pending duet my friend. Until then, I wish you all the best with your work, painting, and general peace of mind. Remember, if you ever need an ear to listen or shoulder to lean on, I will be here for you. Be well dear friend.
        XOXO

        John

  2. A beautiful heartfelt post. I pray that you will soon find a peace with yourself and always keep that love in a special place in your heart. It sometimes sounds trivial when others complain about new obstacles in their lives when we feel our burden is heavier but to each one their own worries are the heaviest. xo

    • Always so true .. indeed .. I have a wisdom of life, now, that I never had when I still had my brother. I can look at others and see how something that just may seem so big, are really not big at all. And I am not discounting the story here, not at all, this writer here is a friend of mine, but I just have learned things from a whole different perspective … one that I would never wish upon anyone! XO

      • Oh my sweet Deby!! I have just finished my ItWorks annual conference .. and let me tell you, we are handing out hundreds of thousands in bonuses!!! I’ll FB message you with more info, but I am bursting with knowledge, motivation and inspiration!!! I so wish you would bring this to your life and your town!!! It is the most incredible business ever!!

        I am continuing to learn each day as my life passes me by!!! While I miss my brother so badly, I am living on in the spirit of him, sharing a life changing opportunity and business, sharing a product and helping people become healthier and look and feel better .. which h is very rewarding!! And I only hope that my little brother looks down on me from heaven and is proud.. I hope I make hi proud all the way up there!

        I’m sending you hugs and I hope you have a beautiful day sweet friend!! (Lets make you a $10,000 bonus … $15,000 sound better? It is time for us to chat, seriously this time mon amie!!)XOXO

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s