Karma Police

Karma Police

*** Tryst Free Write ***

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Sitting, waiting and watching … patiently … is Karma.

People may not ever realize that Karma is watching, or that it is even real … but it is.

Karma has much more patience than we can even imagine. That is why when we are stumbling around, down here on earth, waiting for someone’s Karma to show up, or even our own, and we can’t understand why it is taking so long.

Well, Karma, I have learned, waits for the perfect moment. A moment that we can’t see coming, a moment that we are totally unaware of, a moment that we can’t even anticipate. There are all reasons for Karma, and why it exists, and how it works … Karma is the link to our inner most judge and jury, that of which knows us better than we know ourselves. Karma always knows when we have lied, cheated, stolen, hurt out of vengeance, acted out of pride, hidden out of gluttony and lied out of lust … yes, there are many things that we do as people, and there are many things we think we keep to ourselves, things that we think no one knows … but even if that is so, even if we were extremely careful, and did not get caught, even if we were able to keep something we have done a complete secret from anyone and everyone, except ourselves, even if this is so, we can never keep secrets from Karma (And of our God, as we understand him) … I believe that those 2 things, those 2 infinite beings, those 2 incredibly powerful entities always know what is in our hearts, minds and souls. Karma and our power of a higher being always know if we have good intent, if we are really trying, when we are really hurting, when and if we are right or wrong, if we are treating others well & kind, if we are treating ourselves well & kind, if our intent is good and for the better, if we have really changed our ways for the better, if we are real or not, if our actions match up to our lives and if our lives match up to our thoughts and if our thoughts match up to our inner most wants, needs and desires … they know, us better than we can even imagine, they know what we are doing, what we deserve and where we are going …

I get lost thinking of these things … a lot lately.

I think of these things as I go through this murder trial … praying for justice for the life of my brother, and yet, all the while knowing that none of it really matters. I won’t ever see my brother again. So, none of it really matters.

But Karma, Karma watches … waits … and as much as I want Karma to come down and get to work on the person who killed Dave, I know that I have a long time to wait for Karma to show up on this matter. I know that Karma will. I believe that you can’t possibly take a life, a life that wasn’t even threatening another, take it and just walk away, unaffected by it, with no life consequences upon your own … this cannot be the way it works in the world. Not under this sky, not under the power of higher being who watches us and protects us … this cannot be. So, I believe that Karma will show up, quite some time from now, in its usual fashion, at a time and place beyond my understanding, to pay its dues …

Impatient me waits … for patient Karma Police … to show up and teach someone a lesson … even though I know that, no matter what, Karma will never hurt this person as much as this person has hurt me and my family … Karma doesn’t work that way …

Karma teaches us in other ways …

Has Karma ever taught you?

Has Karma ever given you pain to feel?

Have you learned to change your ways because of the things that Karma has shown you?

~J. Lefever

(10/09/13)

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Evening Reflection on Tryst (05/01/13)

Evening Reflection (05/01/13)

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Karma Points

In life… things are not easy. We do not know all the answers. We do not always make the right choices. We screw up, we succeed. We win, we lose. We smile, we frown… we laugh, we cry. Yes, we do all of these things… and so much more!! Our emotions allow us to feel, our minds allow us to think and make choices.

 

Just because we make a mistake, doesn’t always mean the outcome of that mistake is something we didn’t care about. I say this because… in my life, I have made mistakes without even thinking of the outcome!!Sounds silly, I know… but this actually happens a lot. Especially to those people who are really ‘live-for-the-moment’ kinds, those personality types who are more sporadic, maybe braver, chance takers… extremists… yes, that is me.

 

I think that we have karma points. I think that we do get chances. I think that in the cosmic realm of things… the universe and all its infinite higher powers, and elements, knows when people are of a good soul, or of a bad soul. ((Here is where I struggle with the concept that there are really such souls out there that are bad… but at this point in my life… it know this to be true. Even someone I know, and love so much, can have a bad… oh nevermind… )) ANYWAY~ my point is..

 

Take chances. Live your life. Check in with yourself. Understand it is OK to mess up. You are human. You are going to mess things up sometimes! And if you do… don’t ever allow someone, who says they love you, tell you that if you ever mess up they are done with you! (( Like a parent.. or something… ))

 

No one deserves to hear that!! Love is NOT conditional on mess up’s, or anything!! Love, real love, has no rules.

 

I hope the night finds you well!! I hope you all have some good karma points saved up!!

XOXO ~ Jen

 

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Detours ~ A Free Write

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Detours ~ A Free Write
 
If only, I could go somewhere, and get only one question answered… of all of my un-answerable questions, to the many paradoxes of life, which question would I choose to know?
 
It is a common question that gets asked, in all cultures, I’m sure, all around the globe, and that is: if you could know your future, would you want to know? Like, would you want to know when you are going to die?
 
I think it would be kind of trippy to be told the answer to that. If my time was going to expire soon, if I was going to die very soon, I may wish to know that. If this was so, I’d hopefully get busy doing all sorts of things that I want to do before I can’t… right? I’d for sure get the hell out of this city and put myself on the beach, on an island somewhere… I would not want my final days spent here!! So, for that aspect, I’d probably want to know. Other than that… if I still have many long years of life ahead of me, I can’t imagine what it would feel like to know the answer to a question like that. I don’t think I’d really want to know.
 
Our lives are so full of personal details. At any point, I think, depending on our decisions and choices, we can detour off our paths. Maybe it was supposed to be that way. Maybe any, or all, of our ‘detours’ are meant to happen… written in our fate…
 
Fate.
 
Fate, we all know, is the predetermined principle that certain events are lined out for us and are supposed to happen. You may hear me say, “Oh, that was not meant for me…” or maybe, “This wasn’t supposed to happen”. Even when good, or bad things happen, we think that it is because of our fate, right? In the event of something unfortunate, I say, “My fate is not looking very good right now…”
 
I have taken a lot of detours in my life. I have lived in other cities… for many years, and for a short time. I have circled back to my home town and I know this is not permanent. I have met people, who have brought me to do and see new things. I have lost people too. I have lost people who I thought would always be a part of my life and they turned out to be just a memory for me now. Could all the times I messed up and made bad choices have been avoided? Or was it in my fate to learn and grow up that way? Today, I have some new and wonderful people in my life who I hope to continue to get to know. Today, I am getting ready to make a life change and work in a new industry. Is this path predetermined… is it my fate?
 
I have a lot of questions that run through my mind, every single day… here I am… just thinking about the path I seem to be on right now… and questioning if it is the right one and if it really is true that fate exists and my life is a predetermined chain of events…
 
J. Lefever
 
 
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Daily Reflection on Tryst (03/23/13)

Daily Reflection (03/23/13)

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Yes, I stopped caring…

 It’s a sweet saturday here in the city. Sweet cause that’s what I will make of it. I am in the position this morning to make a really crappy day for myself, mostly because I’m at work, going on like an hour of sleep! Needless to say, I am very tired! I tossed & turned last night, trying to muffle out the distractions in my house and in my mind… and I just couldn’t fall to sleep.

 

I am a person who truly needs and deeply enjoyed a good nights rest! So, when I’m tired and under-slept, I can tend to be a bit cranky. So with that as my amo, why I choose to make my day nice & sweet? Because it is a proven fact that happy energy takes less effort than mad energy. I swear! It’s totally true!! Think about it… When you’re mad, you explode with energy, and not the good kind that people want to be around! When you’re sweet and lovely, while you still have energy, it is just focused the right way, and people love being around that kind of energy! I speak truth & wisdom here… take notes!!

 

So I got my sweet, sleepy ass to work this morning and I’ve been lazily catching up on some reading & writing. Not a bad morning this is turning out to be really… I love that, because that’s how I made it happen! …we don’t give ourselves enough credit in life, we are in control of so much more than we realize at times… huh!

 

This brings me to my reflection today…

 

I am thinking about someone who has taken a turn to the arrogant side. I have to say, I’m disappointed. I connected with this person, and we had great conversations. This went on for a couple of months. Of course, my little gullible heart believed all the words that person spoke to me and now sadly, I’m feeling like a fool. Oh well… at least I am real with people.

 

So, was it all an act? One day, this person just stopped talking to me. Like they are ‘too-good’ to answer a comment or reply, or whatever we normally did to communicate & share. One thing that comes with my sensitive soul, is that when a person turns out to be someone different than I thought, I’m always so so so disappointed and hurt. I take it so so so personally… well, Jen…

 

I stopped taking it personally. I stopped caring!! And it feels good!!

 

I think, OK, I’m glad I know now that this person is a fake, arrogant, douche bag!! I don’t have to waste any more of my time talking to them, and they don’t deserve my sweet time anyway!! In this situation, it’s perfectly OK and good NOT to care!!

 

Have a great Saturday Tryst friends… Don’t let anyone take your sweet and make you sour!!

 

~ Jen

 

Tryst Thought : Don’t waste your time wondering or being upset about someone who sucks!! People may turn out to be someone other than you expected. Most times it’s their loss, not yours, if you are the genuine person in the situation. Don’t waste a minute..

 

See… for me… as soon as I finish this piece… I am done, I don’t have to sorry about it anymore… Gonna have a lazy Saturday at home after work and pray that we don’t get 8 inches of snow like the news has predicted… (we are actually in a winter storm warning again!! how many blizzards are we getting this year? and has Hell froze over? WTF? Where is spring… shit…

 

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Evening Reflection on Trystღ (03/13/13)

Evening Reflection (03/13/13)

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Unnecessary Cruelness

 Good wishes and bright stars, is what I hope for all of you @ Tryst!! I have had a good day. Not the greatest, but good. It was good. I have been slowly coming back to life, after a short intermission, and I am reminded in the process of all the many blessings I have to be grateful for. It breaks my heart that there is cruelty in the world. I tweeted Mr. Hotspur a few days ago, that if I could, I would do anything and everything to end any & all suffering in the world. My sensitive heart just can’t fathom the things that happen at times. And that said… it is a true statement… I am not a fan of sadness and suffering, for any living thing.

To wrap up my good day, I decided to reach out and send a message to my brother’s wife. This is a person who has been so mean to me. A person who, has never taken a minute to get to know me, and I can even quote her on that as she text me those very words after she told me to not text her again. I sent her a very kind message, letting her know that no matter what, I love her. Even though, for no reason at all, I have received unnecessary cruelness from her. I still take the time to be nice to her, as I have always been, and I always will be.

I understand that my family is hurting. We lost a son, a brother, a husband, a best friend, my partner in life whom I grew up next to… we are all in such pain. In this process, I see no reason for the unnecessary cruelness. Especially to any one of us who has continued to show love, generosity and kindness. And as tears of confusion rolled down my face, I realized that me and that girl are just two very different people. While I would never do certain things, or say things, or be mean and hurtful in those ways, it’s just not who I am. My heart is not built that way. My family knows this. My family knows my heart and that is what is important.

Tonight, I reflect on the diversity in the hearts of people. Some choose to carry mean hatred, and point fingers, and lash out on the kind ones whom they know won’t lash back. Others choose to carry warmth, forgiveness and kindness. Inside our hearts, we know the things we have done. If we have done wrong, whether the whole world knows, or no one was there to see it… we will always know. We will always know inside our hearts what we have done, and whether it was right or wrong. We always know our truths. We can’t lie to ourselves. I get to go to sleep, and close my eyes with a clean conscience.

And I know that karma is always watching me. Karma is also watching and waiting for those who are guilty of unnecessary cruelness.

I hope you have a good night and pleasant dreams. ~ Jen

Tryst Thought: The one who stands pointing a finger with anger in their heart, is the one who will end up suffering the most. They will suffer from self-inflicted unhappiness. And they will have no one to blame but themselves. In the end, kindness always wins. And it’s not a matter of winning and losing, but I believe kindness conquers cruelness… eventually… every single time.

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A Little Prayer on Trystღ

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A Little Prayer
 
 
Fallen down on bleeding knees
On the dirty road, you find me
Looking up towards the sky
So down low, far from high
 
I’m like a shallow, empty cup
Filled with nothing, out of luck
Years it took to get me here
Why am I still chasing fear
 
Cloaked in what I thought I knew
Tricked again by thoughts of you
Tell me now, on bleeding knees
What to do, I beg you please
 
Those I’ve lost, I understand that
The ones I have, don’t have my back
Then why oh why be still persistent
When all I need is cruel resistance
 
Yes I’ve learned from yesterday
Why is it still hard to pray
Afraid I may forget my faults
Gamble and risk my glorious results
 
So here I am on bended knee
Humbled, I am surrendering
Make me wise, I swear I’ll listen
Bless me with my definition
 
~ J. Lefever ~
(02/12/13)
 
This is just a little prayer..
A little prayer with big meaning, yes, but not really pain, or regret, or fear of any kind..
This is really just a little poetic prayer…
 
 
 
 
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Daily Reflection on Tryst (02/12/13)

Daily Reflection (02/12/13)

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Empathy & Understanding

 Hi there Tryst friends! Is it Tuesday already!!?? Yea, so it’s only Tuesday, but I’m trying to get back to my regular levels of optimism here.. (insert my cheesy smile) It is a gloomy day here in the city, but that doesn’t mean it has to be gloomy inside our spirits! If any of you are feeling extra happy today, or have lots of soulshine, try to spread it around today! It’s those wonderfully cheerie people that we cross paths with in a brief moment during the course of our day, where their cheer gets rubbed off and passed along, through to you or another, and then you smile, and your smile is passed on to someone… and so forth! I think that smiling and happiness is contagious!! Even if it’s in small doses. It’s still happiness!

Despite my starburst of happy energy this morning, I will still probably face disappointments today. Maybe more so, maybe not. The thing I need to be consciously aware of here, is other people. Today’s reflection is on empathy. Being empathetic is the ability to understand, identify or relate to someone elses feelings. It is the act of being able to ‘walk in another’s shoes’, being thoughtful of people other than just yourself. It’s easy to get all caught up in our lives and our own problems, I mean, we are the most important person in our lives, right? We always need to have our own backs! But, on that same note, it’s very healthy, and good karma points, to practice some empathy and be thoughtful of others as well. 

 

This world does not revolve around just you! There are other’s all around you that are just as important to the Universe as you are! We are all important! We are all beautiful! Everyone’s spirits have important needs!

 

Now, don’t confuse sympathy with empathy! Sympathy is thinking about someone, but empathy is actually “Knowing” the emotion the person is experiencing, or going through, because maybe they have gone through the same emotion oneself. Empathy is a ‘practice’, sympathy is a mindful thought, an exercise of the mind. So, this morning, I had to practice some empathy. I was faced with a personal situation where I had to put myself into the other person’s shoes and think about their needs, not mine. It’s alright, and my day goes on, and hopefully my understanding and thoughtfulness is helpful in any way. It is certainly better than the opposite!!

 We don’t always know what other people are going through. And if anyone out there thinks that they do, well go ahead and knock yourself off your pedestal, because you don’t know all!! I have said before that we are all ‘recovering’ from something in life. This is so true! We never know if someone is going through a really tough time, or just received bad news, or struggling with something, we never know!

 

Be thoughtful of other spirits.

Practice some empathy today.

Not only is it kind to others, but it’s also kind to your own mind and spirit because you are filling your mind with kindness and niceness towards others, and those things are good for our minds!! Bad thoughts are only poison!!

 

Have a sweet & thoughtful day! ~Jen

 Thoughtful Tryst Thought : Treat others how you wish to be treated. Good Karma points!

 

 
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