Little You ~ A Tryst Re-Visit

Little You

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Imagine… At this point in your life, after every moment you have lived up to this very moment… if the child version of you walked in to the room and reached up to you, the adult you, to be picked up and put in your lap… looking at you, the little you, say five years old or so… what would you tell this tiny child? What would you say to your five year old, innocent self…?

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…this question, this deep rooted, emotionally moving, moment of pivitol words to be spoken only to yourself, from you as an adult to you as a tiny, sweet and innocent child, was asked of me by a person I respect very much. When I close my eyes, and picture myself at five years old, and picture my five year old self looking at me now… it made my heart beat fast. I had tears in my eyes. It gave me the urge and desire to want to hold and hug this little girl… me. To look at my five year old self and say, ‘I’m so sorry sweet baby’, is only the beginning. Of course, I have thought about this. I have thought about this very hard. I was forever moved by this question and will use this little exercise from time to time to remind myself that underneath my skin, behind the eyes of me as a grown woman, was once the heart, mind and spirit of an innocent child that did not know any better. As we all start this way, young and small and unable to protect ourselves, then we grow up and in the more time we spend on this earth, how many times have we hurt ourselves? How many times have we forgotten to love ourselves? Or not protected ourselves? Or disapointed, shamed, scared or even lied to our very own selves…?

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I would tell my little self to love myself in every single moment. I would say that if you don’t love your own heart, even one time, then it will be weak and in life you need a strong heart! Others cannot love you if you don’t love yourself. And if you don’t love yourself then it is impossible to give love and to receive love. I would tell my little self that I am very sorry for the times I hurt you and let you down. Learning in life, growing up I didn’t know everything and I never meant to hurt little you, but sometimes I did. Sometimes I forgot about little you and left you alone in the dark, or out in the cold rain. For all of those times when I didn’t know any better, I hope little me can forgive me… image

It does take strength to forgive, little innocent me, so practice this virtue. I would tell little me to remember that I have always loved my tiny heart, my tiny self, and love is what has kept me, us, going. To love is the greatest thing, to be loved is truly priceless and always give to others what you would want for your own self. That is the magic of karma, and karma is always there, right behind you. I would tell little me that I’ve never given up and I never will. I’ll always be here, for me. image

This is a very powerful image, for the mind and spirit. To anyone who reads this, imagine little you sitting on your lap… what would you say? After all the things you have been through, seen and survived so far .. is there anything important enough to tell your little self .. ?

~ Jen

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© Think. Speak. Tryst Publication

For a lovely and beautiful poetic piece that goes brilliantly with this, visit Edward Hotspur’s site Lyrical Anarchy and read Time’s Fleeting Glances

Another beautiful soul that I have recently encountered in my life, you will find her words truly heart-warming, inspiring & will leave you with tears of joy as she is a brilliant example of Human Kind at its up-most Loving-kindness. She has become one of my favorite writers and I look forward to her posts daily!

Visit The Other Side of Ugly by following this link, and let your eyes fall upon the words of The Ugly In Me by following this link. Both of these pieces reminded me of what I was thinking when I wrote this piece above. I know that you will enjoy, and you will find that the writer is an angel herself … among us all … right here in this world.

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Evening Reflection on Trystღ (04/05/13)

Evening Reflection (04/05/13)

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Mind Walks

Happy evening to you. I hope the night finds you all well. I have had a day, quite busy, in my mind. When I spend a lot of time thinking, I call them mind walks. You know, we go outside and take walks… So, when I think a lot, I relate it to my mind walking around in the space of thought, philosophy, life… what makes us us. We are all so different, beautiful and unique. I am such a people person. I’ve always found the mind and soul such interesting gifts we are all given…

Tonight, I’ve been thinking of the scars we have. Not physical scars, like those from injury or accidents. But the scars we get deep down inside.

Life takes us places, shows us things, and gives us moments that leave ever lasting impressions. Impressions, scars, memories, nightmares, even traumatic events unfortunately take place and no matter what we do, or how old we get, or how much time goes by, or any & all the things we do to heal, forgive and/or forget… we still carry the scars on our hearts & souls.

These scars have an impact on the way we handle things in our future. We may have trust issues, or we may develop fear in certain situations because of past events. Our past is what we compare our present and future experiences with, because it is what we have literally already lived through.

I have some scars on my heart. Quite a few, to be truthful. I was wondering, the other day, if even though I am aware of these scars, and even though I have worked through so much, and even though I am in such a good place with myself… I wonder if I still suffer from these scars?

I can’t tell anyone how to heal. We all heal differently. Through my experiences, I can talk about how I got through them and relate to others in similar aspects, but I understand that we all need different things. I don’t think that one person has all the right answers for everyone. (This is why I have a hard time with psychologists who tell people how to heal. Unless the actual person giving the advice has been through it, how can they possibly know how it feels and how to possibly alleviate the suffering?)

My reflection is this: Scars on the heart and soul are deep and real. If we have them, it is important to recognize them and try to nurture them the best way you can for yourself. Don’t let anyone tell you that your pain is not real, or valid. No one gets to tell you how you feel!!

I hope you all have a great night Tryst Fam.

XoXo ~ Jen

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©Think. Speak. Tryst. Publication