Because, I am


I woke up smiling today.
I do that most days…
It has been a long (last 3 years) …
But here I am… because of these amazing things —>
Because I am strong
I wake up smiling
Because I don’t give up
I am alive to tell my stories
Because I am resilient
I am able to still be kind to everyone
Because I persevere
I am able to continue to work hard
Because I am kind
I am able to practice empathy
Because I am self sufficient
I am able to be generous
Because I am understanding
I am able to understand others
Because I am humble
I am able to avoid ignorance
Because I am selfless
I am able to put others first
Because I am brave, I am able to keep fighting… And because I love myself, I am able to take care of ME… and because I am able to take care of me, I am able to be a fierce & strong mother to my son!

Life has taught me many lessons, and here I am to tell my stories! We All Fall Down, but what defines our character How We rise above!


Whispers … (Revisited)

This is something I wrote some time ago for my Soul to Shine space. Tryst is, and will always be, my main blog writing space with the most content and the deepest looks into my truths and my realities … but I created my little Soulshine space for the little pieces with a BIG meaning.

The history and story of what Soulshine is to me and how it came about in my life is something that I have not really shared in great detail. For those who know me, understand what Soulshine is just by knowing me and how my energy works. I am alive in my heart, I am alive in my spirit and everywhere I go, I am a giver and sharer of my Soulshine. I honestly can’t imagine being any other way … and why would I? This is who I am.

Sometimes fewer words have a much bigger impact. That is what you will find in Soul To Shine.

Here on Tryst, I write much more …

I cut and paste this little bit because it suddenly POPPED up in my notifications the other day, and as I said, I wrote it some time ago. This little notification brought me to this piece and I read through it.

This was a Free Write. And one of my favorite Free Writes. So I wanted to share it here … because, well, because I just did.

I hope it reaches someone … anyone … even just one single soul … and they enjoy reading the words as much as I did when writing them.




…she is the moon, up in the sky… she becomes the stars, when you make her cry… her music sings painful melodic blues, telling of times when she had felt used… when you hear her whispering words in the air, listen closely to what you hear… she is telling you that the world can be cold, but you can still have love that is warm to hold… she will tell you that pain will make you stronger, by giving you wisdom to living longer… she will tell you to be aware of all of your time, because time is short and you can’t rewind… she will tell you that yesterday has come and gone, don’t live in the past, it’s a truthful song… she whispers that love is the ultimate gift, to have, to hold, to give, and to wish… so love with your heart, and let your soul shine on through, and never, ever, stop being true to you…

 …Jen Lefever



  ©Think. Speak. Tryst. Publication

After The Rain

Written by Alex of Into Dawn and Me of Tryst… This is a piece purely written to brighten the day… place a smile upon the face… warm the heart… From two wonderful and warm friends… Enjoy!
A Poetic Duet
After the Rain
Those storm clouds finally clearing
The rain no longer falls
The children play in the glowing sun
Instead of behind paper walls
The warmth of the sun
Kisses my skin
Like never-ending days
I feel alive again
The shade beneath the redwood
Is comforting and calm
The leaves floating in the breeze
So lightly graze my palmSo Lost am I in such a trance
In heaven I am surrounded
With beautiful things everywhere
Never again to be grounded

Springtime flowers blooming
The in orange, yellow and red
The simple natural beauty
Much more than can be said.

Sun shinning down upon my skin

Embraced by the world around me
Strom has passed, new day has arrived
This is the way life should be
Written by Alex Hicks & Jen Lefever
Visit Into Dawn by following the link provided. Alex is an amazing writer whose blog is full of talent and sensitive emotion… Join the family and follow his words!!

 ©Think. Speak. Tryst. Publication

If I Could Run

If I Could Run
If I could run
To anywhere but here
I’d run to the moon
To see the stars near
On the tail of a comet
I would fly across galaxies
Floating in the sparkling sea
Losing myself in zero realities
My reason to run
In the rear view behind
The haunting mistake
I’ll never rewind
I travel the universe
Looking for black holes
In hopes to find one
That no one knows
But reality sits grounded
Finding me running nowhere
I’m stuck confronting
What chases me from fear
J. Lefever
Written in February of 2012

 ©Think. Speak. Tryst. Publication

Daily Reflection on Trystღ (03/28/13)

Daily Reflection (03/28/13)



OG ~ Original Gangster



Afternoon & halfway through my day… and then some. Easter is on Sunday and I have some things festering in my mind. I could participate in the normal family get together, dinner, and spending quality time but this year… this weekend… I’m thinking of leaving the city.


I need those little breaks, you know? I write about this a lot. It’s good for me to get a change of scenery. Step away from my daily routine and regular activity here and just go… My mom & I are going to escape the reality of life for a couple of days and go to our lake house. I am really looking forward to a nice quiet weekend to be honest.


Today the city is warmer than it has been all year and the sun is shinning. What have I been praying for, and bitching about, for weeks -> NO! Months!! What have I been bitching about for months now…? Yep! Warm weather and spring time!! Well, the day brings me more of spring than it has all year… and yet, I am battling things up in my head. Yes, I know… it’s always freakin something, right?


Today, I want to put these reflective words out there : Be who you are. Be yourself. Be an OG!! ((And by OG, I just mean, be original))


If there ever has been a time when you have tried to fit a mold that is not who you are? Why? There is nothing more beautiful than seeing a true person for who they truly are. This really goes with my posts on how I cannot tolerate those fake ass mo-fo’s … but I’m not pushing the ‘Don’t’ today … I am pushing the ‘Do’ !!


Don’t you dare sacrifice your genuine uniqueness for anyone!! Don’t let anyone bring you down for being you either!!


I want to stress the importance of this because, like lots of important things in life, I think that in the chaos and in the hectic schedules we carry on each day, it is easy to forget some important things. I’m not saying, oh, we get so busy we forget to be who we are… more like, we get so busy that we forget nourish who we are and in that process of nourishment, improve who we are.


So in the spirit of nourishing my OG, my soul… I signed up for Ariel Ribbon Dance Classes. OMG!! I know, right? I’ll probably totally embarrass myself.. but I DON’T CARE!! My girlfriend and I sat on the phone yesterday and debated signing up for this class… but I said, “Marie!! If we don’t try it, we will neva know!!” So, she and I swallowed our pride and told our ego’s that they were just going to have to handle it if we aren’t the BOMB at this Ariel Ribbon Dancing thing, and we signed up.


Our first class is next week.


I am wicked excited!! ((Oh, and I will do a follow-up on this piece, and post some pic’s of the class… well, as long as I get some good shots, and nothing too humiliating!!)) 🙂


In life, it is so easy to get lost and follow down the wrong path. In these times, we need to remember to find our inner soul shine and get back to our side of the street. These last few years have been very hard on me. But the storms have seemed to pass in my life, for now at least, and I am slowly getting myself back on track… Slowly…


 ♥ Jen
Tryst Thought ~ Making changes in one’s life is very hard to do. Many people say they are going to change their lives, and very few actually do. Be the change, like Ghandi said, that you want to be. But in the process, always stay true to who you are inside. The original you is always the best you!! 
Photo Cred : Me & my silly hubby… being original

 ©Think. Speak. Tryst. Publication






Evening Reflection on Tryst (02/13/13)

Evening Reflection (02/13/13)


Celebrating the Essence of Spirit & Love

 Good evening Tryst family. The sun has fallen and the crisp February air kisses my face as I walked to my car after work this evening. I looked up to the sky and couldn’t help myself but to smile. I had a really good day today, which has been long over due for me. (I have been having a rough last couple of weeks, as those of you who keep up with Tryst know..)

The day was warm and full of sunshine, and with me, full of Soulshine too! I have a beautiful friend, who had an important appointment today that resulted in wonderful news! I tapped into my inner most creativity and wrote some pieces on summer and the joy’s and bliss that come along with that! And, in return, received some warm, kind and loving words from my dearest of Tryst friends, appreciating even more the words I wrote yesterday morning, reflecting on the true honor and value of friendship!

Tomorrow marks the one day of the year that is specifically dedicated to celebrating the joy of love. Love, is such a complex thing. It is one thing that I have always written about, trying to figure out, de-code, decipher, and yet, it still confuses the hell out of me! With that said, I still absolutely, head over heels, love love! I am the hopeless romantic! I love finding love everywhere, and in everything!

As I get ready for bed, putting this day to rest, thinking about my wonderful day, am taking just a few moments to be thankful and express my gratitude for the many loves in my life. I am thankful for the loving friendships that I have in my life. I am blessed with a true loving marriage and the wonderful, unexplainable love that happens everyday between my husband and me. I am thankful for the beautiful, warm, kind and loving spirits in my Tryst friends as well!

Celebrate the essence of love tonight. Tomorrow. And everyday after that!

Love may be a paradox, but there is love to be had!

If anyone doesn’t have another to share love with tomorrow, on the day of love, then celebrate the love within your very own heart & soul! There is love there too!

I wish you all a happy Valentines Day Tryst friends!

May love find its way to you, and may you give love to yourself and to the world!

Good good night!! ~ Jen


©Think. Speak. Tryst. Publication

Daily Reflection on Tryst (02/12/13)

Daily Reflection (02/12/13)



Empathy & Understanding

 Hi there Tryst friends! Is it Tuesday already!!?? Yea, so it’s only Tuesday, but I’m trying to get back to my regular levels of optimism here.. (insert my cheesy smile) It is a gloomy day here in the city, but that doesn’t mean it has to be gloomy inside our spirits! If any of you are feeling extra happy today, or have lots of soulshine, try to spread it around today! It’s those wonderfully cheerie people that we cross paths with in a brief moment during the course of our day, where their cheer gets rubbed off and passed along, through to you or another, and then you smile, and your smile is passed on to someone… and so forth! I think that smiling and happiness is contagious!! Even if it’s in small doses. It’s still happiness!

Despite my starburst of happy energy this morning, I will still probably face disappointments today. Maybe more so, maybe not. The thing I need to be consciously aware of here, is other people. Today’s reflection is on empathy. Being empathetic is the ability to understand, identify or relate to someone elses feelings. It is the act of being able to ‘walk in another’s shoes’, being thoughtful of people other than just yourself. It’s easy to get all caught up in our lives and our own problems, I mean, we are the most important person in our lives, right? We always need to have our own backs! But, on that same note, it’s very healthy, and good karma points, to practice some empathy and be thoughtful of others as well. 


This world does not revolve around just you! There are other’s all around you that are just as important to the Universe as you are! We are all important! We are all beautiful! Everyone’s spirits have important needs!


Now, don’t confuse sympathy with empathy! Sympathy is thinking about someone, but empathy is actually “Knowing” the emotion the person is experiencing, or going through, because maybe they have gone through the same emotion oneself. Empathy is a ‘practice’, sympathy is a mindful thought, an exercise of the mind. So, this morning, I had to practice some empathy. I was faced with a personal situation where I had to put myself into the other person’s shoes and think about their needs, not mine. It’s alright, and my day goes on, and hopefully my understanding and thoughtfulness is helpful in any way. It is certainly better than the opposite!!

 We don’t always know what other people are going through. And if anyone out there thinks that they do, well go ahead and knock yourself off your pedestal, because you don’t know all!! I have said before that we are all ‘recovering’ from something in life. This is so true! We never know if someone is going through a really tough time, or just received bad news, or struggling with something, we never know!


Be thoughtful of other spirits.

Practice some empathy today.

Not only is it kind to others, but it’s also kind to your own mind and spirit because you are filling your mind with kindness and niceness towards others, and those things are good for our minds!! Bad thoughts are only poison!!


Have a sweet & thoughtful day! ~Jen

 Thoughtful Tryst Thought : Treat others how you wish to be treated. Good Karma points!


©Think. Speak. Tryst. Publication