Evening Reflection on Trystღ (02/25/13)

Evening Reflection (02/25/13)

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Mind Chatter

Hey there Tryst Family. How are we all doing on this Monday night? Here in the Midwest, we are all scrambling around the city, preparing for another Snowmagedon!! (Reference my other post on the Blizzard of KC) Literally, people are getting into civil arguments and fights all over town at the Markets, Grocery stores, and the Wal-Marts!! The radio stations are blowing up with these stories of women running down isles, grabbing 20 loaves of bread off the shelf, and other random women verbally attacking them, asking how many kids do they have to feed, and making claims like ‘you aren’t allowed to buy all that bread!!’ Seriously? Is this for real? I’m watching the news right now, and they are reporting sell out’s on bread, milk, eggs and showing rows of empty shelves, isle after isle… I’m thinking, why is this whole city preparing for a storm the size of an Ice Age? It’s some massive snow fall, but even if we do get ‘snowed-in’ our homes, it won’t be longer than a day or two… Really KC, WTF? Like you don’t have food for two days? Like you’re gonna eat 20 loaves of bread in two days? I’m one to say, better safe than sorry, but of you find yourself fighting with someone over that 20th loaf of bread, you think you’re gonna need all that bread? I hate to be the one to say, ‘told ya so’ when the blizzard is over and we are back on the streets, back to life, back to normal, gloomy, February winter in a couple of days. Besides, March 1st is on Friday… Spring is a comin’… let’s all freak the fuck out here!!

OK. Got that off my chest. I’m here to reflect. Today, I had a situation with a little lie. Yes, someone told me a little lie. Later in the afternoon, I got a phone call and the caller, unknowing of this fact, spilled the beans on this little lie. So I had to turn around and confront the lie, cause I’m not going to let the lie fly!! Oh no, I had to confront it. So then it turned into, me being the bad guy, and I had the wrong idea, and they were going to tell me later, but…. yea, yea…. blah, blah…. point is this: A lie is a lie is a lie. No way around it. You lied!!

Have you ever caught someone in a lie, confronted them on it, and watched them lie about lying? That’s what happened today!! This person wanted to lie about lying!! To my face!! You know, I could go on & on about the ridiculousness about this, but we all know what a lie is. We all know when we are lying. We all know that it hurts to b lied to. To be understanding, sensitive and empathetic to the person who felt they needed to lie to me today, I will say this: I understand the main reason that we tell a lie… It is because we are afraid to tell the truth. For whatever the reason, or situation, lies are told because of fear.

So, if you find yourself telling a lie, or embellishing a story, bending the truth, hiding the truth, or not telling facts, keeping a secret, which is another form of lying… ask yourself why you are afraid. What fear is keeping you from being honest, and, is the lie, if found out, going to make things better, or worse?

Is it better to lie? However you want to justify it, a lie is a lie, and lies hurt the people you lie to.

Is it better to just be honest? Whatever fear you’re wanting to lie about, maybe telling the truth about things won’t hurt someone else, and won’t damage your character.

Seems to me like this will avoid a lot of other problems that come with telling a lie. It also avoids the person who lied from having to justify, explain, and rationalize why their lie was ok, when, it wasn’t.

It only takes one lie, getting caught in one lie, for your trust & character to be changed. Getting trust back is a very difficult thing.

The truth will set you free…

Have a good night Tryst Family!! ~ Jen

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Evening Reflection on Trystღ (02/24/13)

Evening Reflection (02/24/13)

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Slap Happy

Buenos Noches Tryst Familla!! It is bitter cold here!! Burr!! And just like that, in the blink of an eye, the weekend is over. Time goes by so fast, I mean, faster & faster everyday it seems!! I was out shopping for food yesterday afternoon and the cashier at the market looked at me and said, ‘Can you believe it is almost March!?’  I looked at her and shook my head. Seriously, where does the time go?

This really got me thinking… (Nah, me thinking? I know, I know, I’m always thinking… and stressing, for that matter… stressing more than thinking, so…) I guess I should say, this really got me stressing, stressing about my life!! I need to get some serious motivation here because time is slipping away, my life is getting further along every minute, and I’m not working hard enough on the things I have planned for myself. When I say this, it gets me depressed, and frustrated with myself, and to be honest, I’m in a really good mood tonight!! So, while I entertain these thoughts, I’ll push them to the side for now and think about realistic things. This means, not getting overwhelmed looking at the whole picture, but small steps that will get me to the place, and the things, I want for myself. Yep. Small steps, small goals… be realistic Jen…

Back to the slapping of the happiness. Have you ever heard the term ‘Slap happy?’ Well, it’s like when you are suddenly surged with this instantaneous burst of happy energy!! I got me some slap happy tonight!! It just came out of nowhere!! I got a boost of feel good and I’m smiling and my husband is looking at me like I did something bad!! (Ha-ha) Sometimes, when I drink wine, I get the slap happy, but that’s induced by the kind of buzz that is associated to wine. (Different kind of buzz compared to other kinds of alcohol, I think) Anyway, since I’m not sipping on a Chablis or Chardonnay right now, I conclude that I got a boost of natural slap happy!! And what’s so wrong with that? 🙂

Tonight, as the weekend ends, and I have thoughts swimming in my mind about the fast-moving pace of time, which is something we all have to live with, and something that none of us can stop, control or change, I;m slapped in the face with the reality that I’m not getting any younger. Obviously. And I have some serious unfinished business to attend to.

I saw a movie on TV earlier, something my husband was watching, about a crew who worked on a sail boat. Boats are a serious passion of mine. My grandpa was a Merchant Marine in WW2, and his love for boats was passed on to me. He had me at 2 years old, sitting on his lap, while he drove his boat around the big lake. I have loved boats ever since then. Well, I’ve sailed on the ocean, and this movie was another reminder of just how much I desire living on the ocean… and yes, having a beautiful boat!!

When you know what you want, you know what you need to do to get it. The way I see it is, I’m lucky to know what I want in my life. That’s half the battle right there!! There are people still trying to figure that out, trying to find what their heart desires. Well, I’m grateful to know my desires. I need to work harder on my motivation and doing what I need to get there. Indeed Jen…

Tonight I reflect on these things:

1. Slap happiness can come from other things, not just alcoholic beverages.

2. Time is slipping away, so get on it!

3. Knowing your hearts desires is half the battle.

4. Motivation is the only thing that will get me moving towards those desires!

5. Get on it! I’m not getting anywhere sitting on my ass talking about it…

I hope this slap of happiness doesn’t keep me up all night…

Have a great night Tryst Family!! ~ Jen

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Daily Reflection on Trystღ (02/22/13)

Daily Reflection (02/22/13)

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The Road to Respect, Just a Little Bit…

 Afternoon Tryst!!! How does the day find you? All good, I hope!! The city is madness!! We are shoveling out our lives from underneath two feel of packed snow!! My husband and I didn’t leave the house yesterday, like many others, who made the choice to not even chance wrecking out cars. So, venturing out today was quite the hassle!!

My husband drives a truck for work, so we left his car in our garage. I have a 4 door, front wheel drive, that gets around quite well in the snow. However, due to the massive amount of snow that KC is covered in, thank you snowpalooza, even it got stuck, trying to get out of the neighborhood and had to be pushed and shoveled out!! Yes, it’s been quite the scene in the city today!! There are cars that are packed and covered in snow, left abandon on the highway shoulders. I haven’t seen snow like this in this city for many many years… not since I was a kid!! Work is slow, I’m sure most businesses are. Jake, my husband, went by my favorite bakery this afternoon to get me some cup cakes, and they were closed!! Bummer!! Cup cakes from Sugar Mama’s bakery are the absolute best!! No cup cakes for me today… (insert sad face)

I was talking with a blogging friend today, and the subject of respect came up. We were talking about humility and strength, referencing addictions, and I made a good point about respect. I thought it was worthy of sharing and making my Tryst reflection today.

When a person truly respects themselves, others will respect them too.

This is so true. Think about it… Makes sense, doesn’t it? How many of us have had a situation in our lives, or gone through a phase, or even just gone out and done something that showed little, or zero, respect for ourselves? Yes, we are all guilty of making mistakes and doing stupid things. It’s ok, you don’t need to admit it, I already know… wink 🙂 (Please don’t feel bad.. this includes me too!! And I am completely aware of this reality!!)

My point is this: you ever hear phrases like, ‘You are what you eat?’ or ‘If you talk the talk, you better walk the walk!!’

These are true and valid pieces of advice!! Apply this to showing yourself respect. Am I what I eat? Well, when I show myself respect by doing the things I say that I’m going to do, or standing firm in my ideas and values and not changing them to fit the different social molds depending on where I am, or by setting boundaries for myself and sticking with them, these are all ways to give yourself respect. When you are walking this walk, others will too. You are leading the way, showing pride and self-respect, and others will too.

If you do the opposite of this, people won’t respect you. How do you expect to have the respect of others, if you yourself don’t even respect you?

Something to think about today…

Do I really have respect for myself?

If I want others to respect me, then I must respect myself first!!

Have some respect baby!! And, Have a super great rest of your day Tryst!! ~ Jen

Tryst Thought: Don’t expect others to give you things that you don’t give yourself first.

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Daily Reflection on Trystღ (02/21/13)

Daily Reflection (02/21/13)

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Snowpalooza / Snowmagedon / Tryst Blizzard!!

 Holla Tryst!! Oh, how I missed you!! It’s been 24 hours since my last post and let me tell you, it felt weird not writing yesterday. But, I needed a day. Just one whole day where I did a whole lot of nothing. I reflected like crazy, though!! Mental reflecting. Well, I did do some writing, I can’t lie, but no publishing. Just some scribbling, here and there, jotting down thoughts, playing with words that rhyme, making up some words, but not much else.

I was real down in the dumps yesterday. I wrote a few pieces that were, full of sadness, to say the least.. maybe I’ll share… maybe not. (?) Let me tell the world what’s going on here today. Highways are shut down. Businesses are closed, as of last night. Schools are out. People are snowed in their homes, literally, snowed in!! The few that think they have somewhere pressing to be, took their cars out in this snowpalooza, and are now stuck in ditches, snowbanks, and have slid off the roads everywhere, into the white abyss. You are unable to see further than 50 feet ahead, what they call white out conditions. The city has declared a winter weather emergency. I’ve never seen anything quite like it, here in the midwest, ever!!

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I lived in Salt Lake City for five years when I was in college. We had snow like this there, obviously, but the feet of snow fell in the mountains, not often did SLC get feet of snow in the valley, but it did happen. The demographic is used to that kind of weather out there, so it’s not quite the news as it is here. For KC, this is something to see…

So, I took a personal day yesterday, and it looks as though mother nature is giving me another day today. Snow is packed up two feet high on my back porch!! Taller than both of my cute, little puppies who are staring out the window wondering how they are going to go potty in this blizzard!! ( I will have to bust out the shovel when duty calls for my sweet little babies, and make sure they have their hoodies on cause it’s really cold!! )

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Today I’m seeking inspiration. What inspires me? What inspires you? Is it reading a great biography, watching amazing things on TV or the news? Looking at art, reading poetry, researching things of interest? Well, all of these things inspire me. I paint. I don’t call myself an artist, but I do throw some oil and acrylic on canvases from time to time and call it art. Abstract mostly, because with abstract it can be anything you want it to be, and it’s whatever to whoever looks at it. I like the freedom from painting abstract. Maybe I’ll paint today…

Inspiration is good for the spirit.

It’s a way to free and expand your mind.

Step out of your box and take a new road from the one you travel on everyday.

I look out the window and this blizzard is still coming down hard!! It’s not supposed to stop all day…

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For those of you, out in other parts of the world, enjoy whatever mother nature is bringing you!! Whether its warm sunshine, or cool rain. Something I did when I was on the inside was imagine I was on a beach, sitting in the sun. I’ve sat on some beautiful beaches all over this world and even though I was locked up in there, my mind was still free. That is something, a freedom, that no one can take from you.

Find your inspiration today…

Find your freedom, using your mind…

And… Have a beautiful day Tryst friends!! ~ Jen

Oh, and don’t worry about me… If I need to go anywhere, I’ll just take my snowboard!!!

Tryst Thought: Art is anything you want it to be… Art is writing, art is music, art is painting, building, creating. We are all artists. What does your spirit create?

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Tryst Reflectionღ (02/19/13)

Daily Reflection (02/19/13)
Limbo
Oh Tuesday, happy Tuesday… What’s going on Tryst peeps? I am having one of those days where I’m just completely out of it… I can’t even put a finger on what’s going on, or not going on for that matter. You ever have a day where you just don’t feel like you fit into your own life? I think my spirit is frustrated because right now, I’m working this ‘Standard-American’ job, living this boring life, and I’m not doing anything, really anything, to make myself happy.
I should be chasing my happiness, as much as I chased my high…
Yep. That’s good sounding advice up there. When someone said those words to me, I think I’ve repeated them over and over in my mind, everyday, since then.What am I doing? I’m doing nothing!! I’m stuck in recovery limbo!!
I am also, stuck in writing limbo.
I really have nothing more to say.
I hope everyone had a great day.. ~ Jen
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Daily Reflection on Trystღ (02/16/13)

Daily Reflection (02/16/13)

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Milestones

My First 365

 

Lazy Saturday morning, I hope you are all having! Hello Tryst! I’ve been up since 7am because I had to be here at work this morning for a half day. Not so bad, half day & all, but I’ll shamelessly admit that if I didn’t have this work to do, I would be at home having a lazy Saturday morning for sure!! Probably sleeping in a little, eventually I would roll out of bed and make some coffee or breakfast, and then curl up with my laptop to play in all my networks and do some writing… still in my P.J’s, of course!! (Now I’m just torturing myself!! I need to stop talking!!)

 

I enjoy working, really I do. But sometimes, only sometimes, I dream of what it would be like to be a stay at home wife. To be able to do whatever it is that pleases me because my hubby brings home plenty of bacon and I am blessed with the freedom to do whatever… I would probably have a series of fiction novels by now because I would write my heart out!! Among many other things, I would have the time to learn to play my guitar better, and I would have the time to paint more (I do oil & acrylic on canvas, abstract, and some charcoal.. but I don’t have much time, ever..) For any of you out there that have this life, I hope you appreciate it, because to most, it’s like a dream.. Yes, I sit here on Saturday morning, dreaming of what that would be like.. humm.. (My mind trails off for a few minutes..

 

This morning, my reflective thought is on milestones. I use this word because my dad sent it to me in a text not too long ago, saying, “That is a huge milestone Jen! Be proud. Yo Dad is proud of you. Love you!” -Dad.

 

Today marks the day of one full year of being clean!

I am very proud of myself! There was a time when I never thought this possible. There was a time when I thought there was no hope for me. There was a time when I was inches from giving up completely. There were many times when I thought my life was destroyed beyond repair. There was a time when I thought my spirit was so broken and dead that it would never come back to life. There was a time when I thought I would never smile again… I could go on & on, but I am aware of all of these times, so the milestone that this day marks, to me, is incredible, amazing, wonderful, miraculous and so much more!

 

Believing in yourself starts from within. We ALL have the power to fight for what we want inside, we just have to make the effort.

No one could do this for me. No one. I did this, and it feels great!!

 

There were people, I’m sure, who said there was no hope for me.. Well.. the best revenge against people like that, is a life well lived!! (That is an actual take on a quote, but I’m not sure who said those words, so I’m not takin credit for them, just using them b/c they are awesome words!!)

 

For the goal setters out there, reaching a milestone is a great feeling!!

Keep pushing towards your goals, and make sure that you honor your milestones along the way!! There are some fights in life that only we can battle ourselves. And in those battles, when we succeed and reach a milestone, the glory and celebration is all ours!!

 

I hope you all have a wonderful Saturday!! ~ Jen

 

Tryst Thought: There are moments in our lives when we are our own kind of Rock Stars!! In those moments, let yourself shine and be proud!! You worked hard for the limelight to be all on you!!

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Daily Reflection on Trystღ (02/15/13)

Daily Reflection (02/15/13)

 

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Nevermind… I’m not Sorry!!!

 

 Hey hey, happy Tryst peeps!! I know you are all sunshine and bubbles today because of, at least, two things: 1. It is finally Friday, and 2. It is post-love day and we are all still buzzing from our wonderful celebrations yesterday, whatever they were!! Right? Each day this week, I have been inching back towards myself, after I completely slid off the hill for a minute. Life throws lemons, right? And sometimes peaches and plums, and even pineapple and watermelons too!! I got hit with a pineapple and it was not full of positivity. Anyway, you all have been so great, hanging in there with me while I, dazed and slightly confused, try to get my Soulshine back and put some acceptance and comfort in my heart while I grieve the loss of my brother… and, ah. see… that’s not where I’m trying to go today, I’m sorry. I know I probably babble sometimes, and I’m sorry for that too, but writing always helps, so I just… write!

 

 OK. Stop the train!

 

This is my point, this is my lesson today, this is my reflection… Did you see what I did up there? In that paragraph? I was writing, then explaining, then justifying, then… apologizing!! (Shaking my head) Uh huh, NO MAMA!! Do not do this Tryst friends!! Do not apologize for who you are!!

 

 Today’s reflection is a good, important one. Do not apologize for who you are!!

 

 I cannot stress this enough!! First of all, this is my blog. Tryst is all mine. I own it. I am the author of it. I am the creator, the light, and the mastermind behind it. I love my community, so much!! Tryst wouldn’t be the same without all of you!! But it’s still my space to write and be me. So, no apologies here, just as all of you should always be proud of who you are and make no justifications for the things that make you you on your blogs, and in your lives too!!

 

 Always stand up tall. Each one of us is important and unique in our own ways, and we never need to say ‘Sorry’ for who we are!!

 

 Have a beautiful day!! ~ Jen

 

 Tryst Thought: Today, I am not sorry for who I am. I am proud of my self, my life, and the path that I am on.

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